As a Peer Navigator with Transgender Victoria, I always encourage the people I’m supporting to spend a bit of time in reflection. Reflection is a way to look back on how much we might have grown, some of the challenges we have overcome (or are currently working on) and maybe some feelings a bit deeper down we are not acutely aware we have.
Feelings are a funny thing, they’re always there. Sometimes at the surface, sometimes a bit deeper, and then sometimes world events impact us so much that those feelings can seem to be hovering right in front of our face.
In my failed attempt to stay off the socials of late and consequently being bombarded with the state of what Trump is doing to not only our transgender, gender diverse and non-binary communities in the US, but also to so many other marginalised communities, I’ve found myself reflecting on how I’m feeling about what it means to be trans in Australia.
To add to this, the recent news in QLD by LNP Health Minister Tim Nicholls regarding the pause on puberty blockers to new patients under 18’s hit close to home for me. You see, I grew up in sunny Queensland and called it home for many years. Yes I still love Rugby League more than AFL, how could you not love the state of Origin matches, but I’ve worked to understand and appreciate a good AFL match, and have called Victoria home for many years.
So in my reflection of what incoming changes may or may not mean for myself and others in our community I remembered how I felt when I first transitioned.
It was the year 2013 and Queensland had just voted in a conservative LNP State Government headed by Campbell Newman. More broadly, Tony Abbott and his conservative Coalition won the 2013 election Federally. So there I was, very early and wide eyed in my gender journey trying to navigate the medical system, coming out to family and friends, navigating work, all the while holding this ever-impending threat of a super conservative state and federal government, and the questions of what would that mean.
Would they pass laws saying I couldn't get the vital medications I needed? Would I ever be able to change my legal name? Or my gender? Would I be banned from all the public spaces that I just took for granted my entire life?
I remember I was afraid. I was so new to this, I didn’t know what the future might have held. But this one quote (arguably one of my favourites) got me through a lot of my thoughts of impending doom. (write this one down in your room, your computer, tattoo it on your arm if you want, just remember it). It’s from Mark Twain and it says:
“Some of the worst days of my life never happened.”
When I reflect on those very conservative government years I lived through, Mark Twain was right. Some of my ‘worst days’ never actually happened. They were in my fears, in my head – they were not the reality.
Facebook had been around for a while, Instagram was only a few years old, so there really was a limited amount of support groups or organisations that weighed in on my feelings of impending doom to say “It’s okay, we’ve been through this before and we will get through this again”. That’s why I think this is an important reflection to share. I did get through that scary time of a conservative government. I did have access to TGD healthcare. I was able to access name and gender changes. I thrived in spite of a super conservative government holding both state and federal office at the time.
Now, I am not dismissing or downplaying the reality of what is happening in Queensland and the US these past few weeks. Because, well yeah, it’s bad. I could try and say our Westminster system of government here in Australia is vastly different to the US, (which it is) and we will never have a ‘President’ who can behave like a dictator making decisions alone because of this Westminster system (which is true). But as a Peer Navigator for Transgender Victoria I hear the fears every day from people within our communities who are scared; worried their very identity might be erased; worried their access to HRT or gender and name changes might be blocked.
Whilst my crystal ball is currently out of order due to the scarcity of parts, (do you know how hard it is to find someone to fix a crystal ball? It’s really difficult), I think we’ll be okay here in Australia. We have so many allies at all levels of government, health care and across the general population. History tells us that we cannot be erased.
When I reflect on the start of my own gender journey 11 years ago I can remember there were challenges. Was it hard work? Yep. Was it scary? You bet. But despite sometimes catastrophizing these fears in my head, some of the ‘worst days of life’ never actually happened, and I got through, and I thrived.
And so will you.
~ Keri, Peer Navigator at TGV
Below are some support lines you can reach out to if you want to chat. And Transgender Victoria’s Peer Navigation program is a safe and confidential space to explore your gender, understand your options, and find the support you need.
Qlife
qlife.org.au
1800 184 527
QLife provides anonymous and free LGBTI peer support and referral for people wanting to talk about sexuality, identity, gender, bodies, feelings or relationships.
Lifeline
lifeline.org.au
13 11 14
Lifeline is a national charity providing all Australians experiencing a personal crisis with access to 24 hour crisis support and suicide prevention services.
Rainbow Door
rainbowdoor.org.au
Rainbow Door is Australia’s first LGBTIQA+ specialist family violence, relationships, suicide prevention and mental health helpline. A service to support all LGBTIQA+ Victorians.
